German Players’ Wives Blamed For Nation’s Shock World Cup Exit

"It can't go on like this..."

German Players’ Wives Blamed For Nation’s Shock World Cup Exit

A German tabloid has jokingly blamed the German team’s wives for their country’s shock World Cup exit, saying they didn’t party enough during the World Cup…

Bild, one of Germany’s most notorious tabloids, has found a scapegoat for their national team’s World Cup catastrophe – the players’ wives. Bild asked the question: “What is actually wrong with our WAGs [wives and girlfriends]?” in the wake of the German team’s World Cup exit.

The paper complained that while the English and Welsh player’s better halves have been partying hard and “have now drunk half of Qatar empty”, there are only boring pictures from likes of Leon Goretzka’s girlfriend and other German WAGs.

“Not thirsty? Dancing leg allergy? Don’t feel like lunging? Be happy that you too are now flying home with your football dwarves! Otherwise we would have sent you summer house specialist Mario Basler to the desert hotel to escalate the party. It can’t go on like this…”

German players in the dugout. Image: AP

This brutal review came after travel issues meant some German player’s wives were only at the World Cup for a couple of nights, reportedly.

Following the exit, there will be a much more comprehensive review of this than Bild’s tongue-in-cheek one, with Thomas Muller being quoted as suggesting that the team’s performance at the tournament was “an absolute catastrophe.”

It’s kind of funny that the Germans are complaining their players’ WAGs aren’t wild enough when you consider the furore back in 2006 when English WAGs were caught going a bit too wild in Germany, leading commentators back then to blame England’s woes on their WAGs’ wild behaviour.

Germany came third in Group E, with Japan going through to round 16 instead of them after a dramatic win against Spain. This is the second group stage elimination in a row for Germany.

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